Are you, too, over-committing to too many appointments?

When you first come to the region, you’ll notice the differences to your home country. The A/C can be set too freezing cold and you’re wearing layers to prepare for the difference in temperatures. Traffic can be challenge and you’ve learnt to anticipate the erratic driving styles of other drivers. Meetings don’t always start on time and you’re bringing some reading material to ease your weight.

Personally, I’m struggling to accept work meetings not starting on time. Worse though, you’ve agreed to meet a business partner, supplier or client at a specific time and place and just as you’re about to start, the phone rings. They had to cancel. If it happens once or twice, fine. We all have been in unforeseeable situations where we needed to drop everything. I’m laughing when a confirmed meeting can’t start because the other party doesn’t even show up. Anyone working in the region, I’m sure, has come across these situations, too.

As much as I’d like to believe there can be a clear separation of work and private life, I know it’s becoming more blurred. In recent times, I’ve seen some friends and acquaintances taking work behaviours like cancelling meetings last minute into our private life area. Now again, if it’s the odd occasion, no worries but it’s a regular thing… It makes me wonder and I’ve made some changes for myself.

I’m only accepting and committing to one personal appointment per day.

Before I moved to this region, I may have met a friend for lunch, maybe another for coffee and head out with the girls in the evening.

For a long time, I’ve continued the same way here. Rearranging appointments to make them fit for the other person and me being able to see both friends the same day. Unfortunately, I didn’t see that it came at the expense of my own needs.

Work can be hectic and I’ve became more aware of my own needs: To find a balance between seeing my friends and setting time aside for myself to recharge. Adding stress by running from one friend to another was not what I needed!

Recently, I’ve decided to change my own time management and am only accepting and committing to one personal appointment per day.

I’ve changed my point of view.

By only accepting and committing one personal appointment per day, I’ve also changed my point of view. I’m more in control of my time and energy.

This also included managing my own expectations. In the Western world, it is a given that once we’ve said we’d meet, we’d meet. There was no such thing like re-confirming a meeting. Nowadays, I’m contacting my friends either the day before or on the day to re-confirm the meeting.

This gives the other party a chance to cancel, if needed, in advance, but more importantly, it sets expectations: I’m looking forward to seeing you!

My time is as precious as is yours.

There are times when we all have to cancel last minute. An unknown deadline had come up or a sick child at home. We are all familiar with it.

There’ve been times when confirmed arrangements had been cancelled for whatever (or for no) reason. Going from that “I’m really looking forward to catching up with my friend tonight” to a disappointment and sometimes also an inconvenience when already or almost there. This time could have been used for something else if I had known about the cancellation earlier.

The same obviously also go for my friends when I had to cancel last minute, or so I’d like to think.

Respect the other.

Whether it’s just natural development or we’ve become so egocentric, I’m not sure.

A business partner is working in recruitment and finds it so amazing how candidates are showing up 15-30 minutes without any explanation. We all know how traffic can be mad at times and if you haven’t planned for the (unexpected) traffic jam, you’ll be late. Calling ahead of time doesn’t require much and shows respect to the other person. Instead of rolling thumbs waiting for you, they can now do a few other productive things.

Instead of waiting and waiting to inform your friend (or whoever you’re supposed to meet), call them once you know that you can’t make it. You now allow your friend to re-assign their time.

I can focus on you.

Having only one meeting per day gives me more energy. You and I have the opportunity to spend more quality time with each other as there’s no rushing to the next meeting. Thus, I can focus on you, what’s happening in your life, what’s important to you!

More time to recharge my batteries.

Committing to only one personal appointment per day allows me to also recharge my own energy levels quicker. I don’t feel as exhausted from the stress associated with running from one meeting to another, being stuck in traffic or fearing to arrive late.

This again gives me more time and energy to enjoy our meeting more.

Have you ever thought of reducing the number of appointments you accept? Or are you the person who thrives running from one date to another? How did you find the right balance for you? I’m looking forward to reading your comments!

Until next time,
Agni